Finding Kelly....

Hi, its me, Kelly!!

Seems like lately I'm apologizing for my absence from the blog but I have to admit that I'm totally enjoying these lazy days of summer with my kids. In the next few weeks, my evening time slots start to fill with sessions and editing so I've made sure to take time doing what I love without regret this year.

Since before Branden was born, I've always been dedicated to work. I quit my job at the law firm to become a cosmetologist (don't laugh at me like they did)...a career I was confident I could do from home so that I wouldn't have to leave our future baby with a sitter. I knew I wanted at least two kids, hopefully three. I figured if I could produce two good ones I might be able to convince Jean that a third was a good idea! I believe ten months was the commitment I made to that school to get the license to beautify others...and then I set out to work on my little family! It took a year for us to get pregnant and in that time I permed, colored and cut for friends and those they chose to share me with. I also decided that I was a pretty good typist from my days at the law firm so I should try to take on some extra typing to help with the bills. Gosh, staying home as a mom is such a guilt-ridden job - its the most important thing any woman or man can do, deciding to raise their children full time - but the guilt you feel when you don't bring in an actual paycheck can cause such a private burden on ones heart. I always felt I needed to do more...and more.

My office at the small house was located on the main floor and soon the typing took over as a more lucrative business. It allowed me to work and listen to my babies playing, sleeping, eating, etc. all at an arms length away. It was perfect for me - typing with one hand and rocking a bouncer with the other (actually, I typed with both and bounced with one foot).

The move to the new house puts my office in the basement living space...removed from the rest of the family. It's good...the kids are older and don't require my constant monitoring. It's bad...because I miss being in the hub of all the things that happen here. It's good...I'm NOT working nearly as much at the pc as I used to! It's bad....I'm not ABLE to work as much as I used to! I have taken some time off from promoting myself as I try to find the right fit with the work/family life. The timing with school ending and the summer beginning has helped put my priorities back into perspective. I once made a photo frame for Jean for his desk at work with a picture of the kids in it that said: "The people you work for are waiting for you at home". I was feeling tied to the pc and this new found (forced) freedom has awarded me with treasures of new memories, trips and things I would never have allowed myself to experienced in the small house.

Last week we shared our home with this sweet young lady from the big city! Alexus came to us from New York through a program called the Fresh Air Fund. She's only 6 but has never seen the countryside (we have LOTS of bugs!). Alexus stayed at our home for a week...and we enjoyed the little bit of city she did bring with her (her fear of the dark and super cute accent). At first she was shy...but soon enough, she was chatty and fit right in here! She shrieked at the sight of bugs or crabs on the beach and for the first three days, she thought Jack was out to get her. She'd squeal and jump on the furniture and he'd follow thinking a new playmate was the BEST!! We took her to local places that we take for granted and even my kids were thrilled with the way we spent the week.

See...serenity, I'm squeezing in as much as I can!

Our own pond here at the house offers its own bit of serenity...if you're not afraid of bugs, or sharing it with the locals (turtles, loons, bass and sunfish). My boys are thrilled to have a fishing hole of their own and Jean bought us all a tractor tube for lounging on these 90+ degree days. Its like my past is mixing with my future here and creating the best little bit of heaven one could ask for.

Here's my nephew jumping from the rocks to the right of our beach area....(the turtles lounge on a log along the cove just behind there to the right).

Here's a prize fish that Branden caught and cooked the same evening....it started his addiction!

So, I must admit that I'm curious if my posts are missed much...besides my family and friends who continually tell me to UPDATE! I'd love to hear from readers...I'm thinking of bringing back my daily writings to a blog not associated with my business....maybe I'll make it like a secret club and the only way you can get the link is to request the address!! :)~ If you think you want in....write me at: jkroy(AT)roadrunner.com

I'm off to tend to Jack, who lost his manhood today...poor thing is just lounging on his doggy bed...needing a little love.

Choose happy!

Enjoy!

~kel~